Promises Kept

 I have started two posts for this week's Thursday blog. Both of them are interesting to me, but they aren't quite what I want to write about. I am having to force the topics a bit much. That doesn't feel good. 

I think instead I want to talk about being a Dad. I have made some interesting Dad moves lately. I am enjoying them quite a lot. I am also always looking to expand my repertoire. I have come to think of parenting differently. That is a good thing. Like all of life, parenting is a bit of trial and error. I have done plenty of error. 

Teagan is finishing up Kindergarten over the next couple of months. It is a fun time. She has enough literacy that her interest in books is really blossoming. Hopefully with a little investment and focus she will be a reading addict. 

I devised a plan that I am tweaking as we go. The initial thing came together as a result of the book fair at her school. I let her spend a stupid amount of money and gave her no real limits on her choices. I did this intentionally knowing that some part of what she would bring home would be junk like the color changing My Little Pony book.  

I think junk is really good for kids. It helps them learn about quality in a subtle way. I am fairly certain that I could be blindfolded and can tell the difference between brand name Lego blocks and any generic competitor to this very day. I learned discernment from exposure to plenty of cheap junk way back in the 1980s. That was when McDonalds had legit Hot Wheels in the Happy Meal. Don't test me.

Back to the books. Teagan made a couple of trips to the book fair. It built excitement that she had her own funds to spend as she saw fit. I inspected her choices. More importantly, I asked her what she wanted that she couldn't pick up. There wasn't actually much, but I made a small Amazon order to surprise her with two titles. 

The next step required a little more attention. I had to pay attention to what ended up in a pile on the floor and which books she looked through regularly. Mo Willems and his Pigeon really won the day. We spent about a week worth of bedtimes on the two books she picked up. Then we dug into the big bookshelf where the majority of her books are housed. We came out with a stack of Gerald, Piggie, and Pigeon books that were already at the house. 

Now, I could have kept cranking out new books from Mo Willems for a while. With a small library of about six preferred books already on hand though I figured we had enough variety for a day or two. That is when I started negotiating a deal. I am trying to encourage both her attending to being read a bedtime story and, more importantly, her reading for herself to learn and enjoy. 

As the excitement around her little library started to wane a bit I made the offer I had been carrying around in my hip pocket. "Teagan," I said," Would you like it if I bought you a couple of new books a week?" Little does the kid know I have been steadily stocking the house with books for her since birth. We could likely read something current age appropriate for months without ever recycling a title. She doesn't notice that. The bookshelf isn't something she plays with. 

To her this offer has magical allure. She rose to the occasion by knowing what Mo Willems books she wants next. I went directly to the bargain. "Tell you what, kiddo, if you can read two of those books to me then I will buy you two more. When you can read those to me, I will buy you a couple more. Sound good," I asked watching her six-year-old greed growing like the Grinch's heart on Christmas Morning in Whoville. 

The kid has been repeating this pretty steadily. I keep ordering more books. She is devouring them hungrily. Though after a few cycles this has ceased to be about getting new books ordered. She is just enjoying stories more and more. I am at a stage now where I am starting to sneak in a little variety to what she is reading. We might do a little run of Maurice Sendak or Doctor Seuss alongside her preferred Mo Willems because Pigeon, Gerald, and Piggie are amazing, but I require variety to maintain my own interest. 

Speaking of Legos, I find building them really relaxing. I always have. In fact, several years ago when the doctor told me to find a way to relax and be calm like I did when I was a kid I really considered getting back into Legos as an adult. There are certainly plenty of cool sets out there. I have to admit I have an AT AT I have put off building for nearly two years because I don't have a good place to store it when I am finished. I can only imagine the pain of hearing that beauty crashing to the floor in 1,267 pieces after I had spent a few hours putting it together. 

I have a strong feeling the AT AT goes together this week. Maybe Teagan will help. 

I have been setting aside a couple of house each weekend to build an age appropriate Lego set with her. We started with kit that let her build an owl and a hedgehog. Super cute! Next we built a tractor trailer and a couple of race cars. I have an unopened set with two little girls and their electric vehicle on tap for her to build. 

I am varying up the types of sets I put in front of her hoping something will stick without the pain of letting her tour the toy aisle. I haven't looked to see if Bluey has released Lego sets yet, but I am certain that would be a homerun for us both. Yes, I enjoy Bluey too. 

I really enjoy the Star Wars sets. I can keep a few of those on hand for us to work on together. Toss in the occasional thing that grabs mine or her eye and we have a little hobby that we can do together and both of us be happy and relaxed. I enjoy the time even when it was a Owl and Hedgehog reading a book. Legos are just cool and my kid is freaking awesome. 

The most fun thing I have been doing lately though isn't anything to do with spending money or a whole lot of time. Every morning and most every night I make a point to throw the kid over my shoulder and either carry her to or from her bed. She giggles herself silly and gets crazy excited about it. Its a ritual she connects to me. Its a simple bond, but we both enjoy it. 

I even managed to turn it into a little lesson for her. I had a nasty headache last night and didn't feel up to the night carry to bed. She took it like a champ with the promise of a double helping of carries tonight. 

She got settled into bed and was nearing sleep when it hit me that I had not kept my promise. I ran into her room, threw on the lights, and ordered her up. On the walk out of her room and into mine I explained, between her giggles, the importance of keeping a promise. I dropped her to my bed and took a minute to make sure she understood before giving her the second promised airplane ride. 

Promises are even more important than bedtime. Yeah, she bounced around hyper and happy for twenties minutes longer than she would have if I hadn't stopped writing and come to keep my promise. No, she probably wouldn't have remembered if I hadn't kept my promise. That is when it is most important to do so, right? I appreciated a chance to show her that she is more important than my writing. I also showed her integrity. How many chances come along to do that naturally?

A funny thing happened after that short little interaction. I was in a decent mood and feeling pretty good before, but I found that I was sitting at my desk smiling, proud, and content. My nap after dinner had helped with the headache from a long work day, but I felt totally refreshed after carrying my favorite sack of giggles back and forth. 

Kids are magical. There is so little of that in the world that it is a major miracle to be able to slow down and just appreciate them a bit. Mostly it makes life worth living and helps keep things in perspective. I need to spend some time playing some Spades or Canasta with the oldest. Shoulder rides are probably a bit awkward after age 20, but who knows. 

I love the little one even when she is odd. She had a plate full of New York Strip and Baked Potato tonight. What does she want more of four times during supper? The shredded cheese that we had for dressing the potato! Kids are magical and a mystery. I hope I was once that weird and wonderful. I am grasping at straws to teach her the value of eating the delicious, perfectly prepared steak first. 

Oh well, this whole thing is trial and error.